On bullying and animosity

[Dave V]

Team,

Generally we get along quite well for a group with such diverse backgrounds and interests.  We may not each get along with every other individual on the Railwire, but what makes this crazy modeling family work is that generally we treat one another respectfully.  That breaks down sometimes, just as it does in a real family.  Sometimes in the heat of the moment we are wont to say things that sting, or we may find ourselves so convinced we are in the right that we'll say whatever it takes to have the final word, irrespective of the collateral damage.

Many of us also know one another outside of the Railwire.  Sometimes that means we are great friends with our fellow members, but sometimes it means we aren't.  Among people who are as passionate as we are about our hobby, we can sometimes develop animosities, both online and in real life.

Here are my requests, both as a moderator and as a long-time member of the Railwire family.  And yes, I absolutely have been guilty of some of these sins myself, more than once...  I'm a very flawed individual!  But I strive every day to be a more decent person.

1)  Please keep outside arguments outside the Railwire.

2)  Please keep criticism constructive.  You'll hear "better modeling through peer pressure."  While TRW did not pioneer that motto, we've adopted it.  But implied in that motto is that you're actually being helpful so that the modeler in question can rise to the next level...only if he/she actually wants to.

3)  We're "not your father's forum"...which means we have different and much more relaxed standards for adult language and humor than your typical train board.  But bullying is not included in the spectrum of acceptable behaviors.  Being a train bully is not just pathetic, it has zero place here at TRW.  Bullying will get the banhammer.

4)  Part of keeping the peace among such a diverse group is keeping politics out of this.  Some of you love Trump, some of you hate Trump, and still others are waiting on another asteroid to wipe us out.  Not a one of you is going to change someone else's mind about Trump (or anything political for that matter) through posts on a train forum...so please leave the politics for your Facebook echo chamber.  I understand when it comes to overseas manufacturing, politics are very difficult to avoid.  But they can be if you try.

5)  In other words, as Bill and Ted would say, "Be excellent to each other."  It's that simple.

[Dave V]

I'll add that I was called upon yesterday to moderate and my original post, now greatly modified, was too heavy-handed.  I apologize to those of you who saw it...my language was quite harsh and out of proportion to the situation.  Bullying is a hot button for me.  Recognizing that and going forward I will keep that in mind as I explain the reasoning behind moderator actions I may need to take.  We pride ourselves on allowing a broader spectrum of vocabulary, but my use of that language was excessive and abusive.

[peteski]

I actually saw your unedited post and I thought it was right on target (although in hindsight, it might have been wee over the top for a moderator).  Remember: I never sleep! 

[Jbub]

*curiosity peaked* but out of respect of those involved I'll quell it.

[DKS]

As someone who was acutely and mercilessly bullied from grades 4 through 12, I'm altogether too sensitive to the topic. Thank you, @Dave V for bringing this up.

[Dave V]

I actually saw your unedited post and I thought it was right on target (although in hindsight, it might have been wee over the top for a moderator).  Remember: I never sleep! 

I'm not sorry about the fundamental message--the keeping outside fights outside and not bullying one another--but I am sorry for the angry, abusive, and rude way in which I chose to articulate it.  There's no easier way to abdicate the moral high ground than to partake in the very behavior you're attempting to decry.

[peteski]

I'm not sorry about the fundamental message--the keeping outside fights outside and not bullying one another--but I am sorry for the angry, abusive, and rude way in which I chose to articulate it.  There's no easier way to abdicate the more high ground than to partake in the very behavior you're attempting to decry.

No problem - we can all have bad days, then we regret our actions. In your case, you caught yourself and took care of it.  IMO, your post wasn't that bad - just colorful. 

[wazzou]

I thought Morty was hilarious.

[Dave V]

I thought Morty was hilarious.

There was probably a more lighthearted context with which to trot out Morty though!

[Mark W]

True colors have been displayed, and all parties are given the opportunity to improve their behavior. 

The event was moderated dynamically and appropriately at all stages of the timeline. 


Nothing further needs to be said. 

[John]

True colors have been displayed, and all parties are given the opportunity to improve their behavior. 

The event was moderated dynamically and appropriately at all stages of the timeline. 


Nothing further needs to be said.

Agree!