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If you buy a classic car, commission a frame-off restoration and then win at the Pebble Beach Concours, who receives the trophy?Does it go to the car owner or to the restorer?
Switch over to giving away some ribbons and see how quickly he changes his tune.
The issue of submitting a model over and over in the same contest is less cut-and-dry. It is not something I would personally do over-and-over again, but I also see the viewpoint of "if you want to be the best, you have to beat the best". Now, that is not stated in an ultra-competitive/"cut-throat" manner, but rather as a motivator for folks to improve their modeling...
I think that in a judged contest, refusing to accept judges decision is not Kosher. They thought that for some reason, your vehicle deserved it better than your friend. Instead of refusing, you should have asked what specifically made them choose your car over your friend.